White Board Session

The Parole Board wants to send a special shout-out to the INMATES that attended the White Board Sessions event.  The purpose of the event was to keep the INMATES updated with our plan for the upcoming LBB Documentary film and to also get ideas and feedback from the INMATES regarding what they'd like to see in the film.  We had a good turnout, despite the bad weather; and more importantly, we had a great brainstorming session with the INMATES that attended.  Many scenarios, concepts and impressions where exchanged.

The White Board Sessions event marked the end of our pre-production phase.  We are now moving on to the production phase, which is really excited.  This is when the real fun begins.  Of course, we will keep you updated as things develop.  The red carpet premier of the film will occur on Wednesday evening, November 19, 2014 at Club 8 in Dallas.  Please mark this date on your calendar as it will be an event you won't want to miss.

Thank you again to the INMATES that attended the White Board Sessions event.  As always, LBB would be nothing without the dedication and support from the INMATES.  With this film, we plan to show the rest of the world what we already know - life in the service industry is like nothing else you'll ever experience.  TOAST!

It's That Time Again

So, here we are, in the middle of another holiday season.  And you know what that means, Christmas music playing everywhere you go, spending time with the in-laws, last minute gift buying for people you really don't give a shit about, lying to our children about an overweight man that breaks into our homes and eats our pastries, and of course, welcoming in the new year. 

 

Unfortunately, most of the INMATES have to work on New Year's Eve.  While millions of daywalkers raise their glasses and toast to all the possibilities that lie ahead, the INMATES, much like Rudolph, don't get to partake in those reindeer games.  Sure, you might have a shot, or two, or three; but you are still working and watching others actually having fun.   

But, in case you are new to Life Behind Bars, The Parole Board came up with a way to solve this yearly dilemma.  Each year, on January 1, we rewind the clocks and give the INMATES their own New Year's Eve party.  This year, we will be welcoming in 2014 at Trees in Dallas, Texas. The past two years, our new year's parties were casino theme events. This year, we are changing it up a little bit  



In case you missed out on the 2011 Rock N Shot Comedy Show, let me explain the concept.  Here's the recipe:

• 1 stage;
• 3 parts extremely funny comedians;
• 3 parts talented musical acts;
• 1 DJ;
• Hundreds of INMATES; and
• An endless supply of booze.

When you mix all those together; voilà, you have the Rock N Shot Comedy Show.   The comedians and the musical acts alternate performances throughout the evening.  Drink prices will be extremely cheap thanks to the owners of Trees, Clint and Whitney Barlow (they are huge LBB supporters and always welcome INMATES in their establishment).  As midnight approaches, we will countdown from 10 to 1 and just like a 13 year old boy, the ball will drop.

You can buy tickets in advance on our website - www.lifebehindbars.net/  Tickets purchased by December 25, 2013 are $25 per person and $40 a couple.  Tickets purchased after December 25, 2013 are $30 per person and $50 per couple.

We've also contacted local hotels and made arrangements for reduced room prices that night.  Please contact Hotel Indigo (1933 Main Street, Dallas, Texas 75201) or Hyatt House Dallas (2914 Harry Hines Boulevard, Dallas, Texas 75201) for more information.  And to ensure that all INMATES riot responsibly, we have arranged for transportation to and from the hotels (more details on this will be announced closer to the event).

So, gather up your friends and mark your calendar. Doors open at 8:00 p.m. on Wednesday, January 1, 2014. You can dress to impress or dress like a mess. Either way is cool with us.

 

 

    

LBB Drama - Don't Start None, Won't Be None

Up until recently, joining LBB was pretty simple.  We already considered those in the service industry as INMATES, so just by doing your job, you were part of LBB.  But if you wanted to participate in the online discussions, then you had to request to be added to the group.  However, once you made the request, The Parole Board would add you and that was it.  About as simple as it gets.

But, being simple doesn't always translate into being better.  And it seems that lately, some individuals have infiltrated the group under the guise of being an INMATE.  Said individuals have shown certain posts and comments made by their co-workers on LBB to the management at their cells.  This, of course, has caused some problems for those involved.

Yes, it's true that if you are, or were, connected to the service industry than you belong on LBB.  But, apparently, we need to be more specific about a few unwritten rules of conduct.  However, with this article, I suppose they're no longer unwritten rules.  Regardless, LBB is a place for those in the industry.  Bartenders, waiters/waitresses, cocktail servers, security, chefs and cooks, bussers, even managers and owners.  You are given the forum to discuss what's on your mind without the fear of repercussions of what you say. 

Of course, some will quickly point out that, if you are posting something on the internet, then you are assuming the risk of whatever fallout ensues thereafter.  And I can't disagree with that assessment.  Also, I realize that there is always more than one side to a story, and I'm sure the individuals that have informed upper management about posts on LBB have their reasons for doing so.  Whether anyone else agrees with it or understands it.

But, openly sharing your thoughts and opinions is at the center of what LBB is about.  Once people begin to worry about their words, we lose the ambiance that we've grown so accustom to.  If you have to rethink each thought you want to share, LBB will quickly become a shell of what it once was.  Being reluctant to express your beliefs for fear of what might follow is a plague that will spread like wildfire if we don't take active steps to prevent it.

And so,The Parole Board is doing what we can to help this problem.  Instead of just adding anyone to the group that made the request to join, we are now screening applicants.  Once a person asks to be added to LBB, The Lifer interviews the person in order to ascertain how the individual is connected to the industry, why they want to be a part of LBB, etc. 

We believe this will help reduce the issues that some INMATES have experienced lately.  Of course, we won't be able to catch each person at the door.  And that's where you come in.  If you know someone that doesn't belong in the group, send a message to The Parole Board about it.  Several INMATES have already done this and we've removed the pretenders from LBB.  We need to police ourselves and while we are at it, we must have the mutual understand that this group is for our benefit.  Whether it's strictly from an entertainment perspective or as an emotional outlet, LBB is your canvas to discuss your thoughts.  Don't ruin it for everyone by selling out your fellow INMATES.        

In closing, I'll leave with the words from Nas' song Made You Look...

"Don't start none, won't be none."

2013 LBB State of the Union

 

Lately many people have been asking me about Life Behind Bars.  Specifically, I get asked how things are going, what new concepts are on the horizon, are there any events coming up, etc.  All of which are great questions that I feel are deserving of a detailed answer.  So, this is my attempt to explain the current status of LBB.  Think of this as a State of the Union address for Life Behind Bars if you will (Props to The Warden for the graphics above).

As most of you reading this already know, The Parole Board has a lot of big ideas to help unify the service industry.  After all, that's the entire concept behind LBB.  One of our biggest goals as company has been to create our own website.  Certainly we love using the Facebook group page to bring the INMATES together.  But, that's not how we want to operate perpetually.  Having our own website means we are not confined to set rules and parameters regarding content and design; we will only be limited by our creativity.

For a long time now, The Parole Board has been working on our website.  Over a year ago, we hired someone to create the site and we even managed to get the site in limited Beta mode.  I'd like to take this moment to give a shout-out to a few INMATES that were willing to help The Parole Board Beta test the website.  Those individuals are:  Marcus L. Rogers, Danielle Pirtle, Patrick Zimmerman, Skylar Rain and Brian Peritore.  From the beginning, they have been very supportive of LBB.  They have helped generate a lot of wonderful ideas, concepts and buzz for The Parole Board.  So, while I might be going off on a tangent here, I think it's warranted to give these INMATES their props.  Thank you, seriously.  You guys are awesome.

So, as I was saying, we began Beta testing the site and through that process, came up with a lot of great ideas.  However, the issue then became that, with those new ideas our website developer needed more money to implement them.  A lot more money actually. 

We then decided to throw an INMATE Riot (party) to help raise some extra capital for the website.  In fact, we've thrown a few Riots and continue to sell LBB contraband (merchandise) to raise capital for the website.  However, despite our efforts, we still need more money.  Building a website is a lot more expensive than I ever knew.  Too bad I wasn't born in India; I'd have this website development shit on lockdown.  But, alas, I was born in Indiana.  Which means I know as much about website development as an Indian knows about snow shoes and corn fields.  And by Indian, I mean Slurpee not Casino.  It's ok to laugh at that reference, it's funny.

Anyway, we are tired of raising a little money, but not enough to take LBB to the next level.  We need a website as it will be the central hub that everything else branches out from.  But, what does this all mean?  Well, it means that in order to get the website The Parole Board wants, we are going to have to look to outside financing.  Which is exactly what we have been doing.  Side note - our website is up and running, but it's a static site.  Soon it will be highly interactive.  In case you haven't been to the site yet, here's the link: http://www.lifebehindbarsisthebomb.com/LifeBehindBars/INMATES.html

We have spoken with numerous potential investors over the past few years.  There is a lot in interest in investing in LBB, which is a good thing.  But, the issue that we have constantly encountered is that all savvy investors want to see a business plan.  Actually, that's not the issue, the issue is that no one on The Parole Board has the slightest clue how to construct a legitimate business plan.  We have tried to create one on our own and it ended up looking like a project completed by the local elementary school.  And so, there we were with our concept and our potential investors, but without a business plan to bridge the gap.

                         
 
Well, that has all changed.  The Parole Board is good friends with a fellow INMATE that just so happens to write and review business plans for a living.  Not sure if he wants to be mentioned by name, so for now, let's call him Dre.  Dre is an accountant for a very successful firm.  He handles mergers and acquisitions for said firm.  What does that mean?  Well I am glad you asked that.   I'll tell you what it means.  It means he's a badass.  And, get this, best of all, he's one of us.  Not only have we been friends since way back in the day; he's also been in the service industry, but like me, he's now a daywalker.  But that doesn't mean he has forgotten his roots.  Dre has been helping us concoct a really impressive business plan and pretty soon, we are FINALLY going to have something we can show investors in order to get the much needed capital that will help us launch the LBB website. 

To all those that have wondered why it's taken so long to reach the next level, I hope this State of the Union address helped you better understand things.  We are getting close, very close.  Stay tuned for more details.
       

Save the Internet!

INMATES, it's time to make your voice heard.  Once again, your freedom of speech on the internet is at risk of being severely restricted.  If you recall, several months ago I wrote an article about this issue and asked you to take action - and many of you answered the call.  Well, it's that time again.

This month, the International Telecommunication Union (ITU) is holding meetings with representatives from countries across the globe to re-negotiate how we communicate on the internet.  Attendees of the meetings will be select government officials from several countries.  The issue here is that many of the representatives at the ITU conference reside in countries that are against the internet and especially sharing your thoughts openly.

Some of the proposals before the ITU could impede our your ability to speak your mind.  Additionally, services like YouTube and FaceBook would have to pay fees in order to operate in certain places.  What does this mean?  It means that our society will not be able to enjoy the infinite sharing of information that we are so accustomed to.  Also, it means that FaceBook, YouTube and other social media sites might start charging users to help mitigate these new operational fees.  Needless to say, this is not good.

Please take action and make your voice heard.  Let's keep the internet functioning as the ultimate mechanism that facilitates free speech for everyone.  Click the link below to learn more and to be a part of the solution.  Toast!

http://www.google.com/intl/en/takeaction/       

Going Back to Cali

Since The Parole Board released the teaser video for Life Behind Bars The Series, we've received a lot of inquires about the project.  Many INMATES have asked how they could be a part of the show.  One thing we keep letting everyone know is, assuming we are able to get the funding that we need, we will begin casting calls soon.  Also, the plan is to use original music in the series, so we will be searching for musicians to assist us in writing a soundtrack.

However, before any of that can happen, we will have to raise enough money to fund the project.  Hence our recent campaign on Indeigogo.  If you don't know what I am referring to, click here to watch the teaser video, to learn more about the show concept and to see how you can help http://www.indiegogo.com/lifebehindbars/x/1849014?c=home 

We have set a goal of $50,000 and have given ourselves 88 days to get there.  Already we have received several donations and we are extremely happy.  Of course though, we are a long way from our goal.  But, get this, today we received calls from Fox and from the producers of American Idol and X Factor.  And that's not the first time producers in L.A. have contacted us about the show.  And, just like before, both of these companies were interested in the concept and wanted to learn more.  Can't really tell you how exciting it is that Hollywood wants to know about Life Behind Bars.

Again, we are still at the very beginning of this process, but so far, things are going well.  My plan is to keep you updated each step of the way. Raise your glasses, this is an exciting time for Life Behind Bars and all the INMATES.  

TOAST.

Is There Anybody Out There?

So I was reviewing the analytics for the blog page today and noticed something interesting.  The image below depicts the URLs (web addresses)  of viewers of the blog over the past month.  As you can see, in the past month the blog had 50 hits from Russia, 4 from Germany and 1 from Latvia.

I would like to know if this is legit.  More specifically, are there really people in those countries that read the blog?  Or did someone accidentally stumble upon it?  That seems possible, but 55 times in the past month?  Maybe it's some computer spam thing and no one is really reading the blog in Russia. 

Or, perhaps we actually have people reading the blog in other countries.  After all, it's certainly plausible as we have INMATES in few countries.  But Latvia, Russia and Germany were not ones that I knew about. 

The reality of the situation is that I have no clue.  But, I would like to know the answer.  If you have an ideas, please let me know.  Or, better yet, if you are reading this and do not live in the United States, please post a comment. 

Service Industry Unite.

Meeting Adjourned

Just had a multi-hour Parole Board meeting and I don't think I've ever been this excited about LBB before.  Things are coming together rather nicely for the company.  The website is almost ready.  Well, at least on the functionality side - which is the hard part.  Making the site look visually appealing will be easy.  We have The Warden for that. 

We have a phone conference with our website designer tomorrow night.  The purpose of the call is to discuss the status of the changes we asked him to make to the site.  From what I can tell, he has already made most of the changes.  I like the way the site works.  It's pretty easy to navigate and once the last few changes are made, it will be very user-friendly.

Anyway, the now that site is nearing the point where we can release it, we have a lot of new ideas.  The website is going to open a lot of doors for LBB.  Because of the site, we are going to be able to do things that just weren't possible before.  And tonight, The Parole Board came up with some really great ideas in our brainstorming session.  We got great use out of our white boards tonight. 

We discussed our ideas for marketing LBB and the most effective ways to recruit new INMATES.  That is a big topic for us.  The plan is to unite the service industry.  Not to just unite the service industry in Dallas.  Or just in Texas.  We want LBB to be global.  After all, the more INMATES we have, the more we can give back to the industry.

The Parole Board also talked about the various forms of media and entertainment we plan on venturing into.  Since day one, Life Behind Bars was an idea for sharing stories through a book and also a movie.  Well, those ideas have never gone away.  We left them on the back burner until the timing was right.  And although it's not quite that time just yet, we are getting a lot closer to venturing not only down those paths, but also into some areas that we never even considered years ago. 

Also, I had a phone conversation with someone today regarding investing in the company.  This person, who shall remain nameless for the time being, seems like a good person to have on your team.  I have been in communication with him over the past several months, but very sporadically.  Today though, was the first time we spoke at length and he is very interested in LBB.  Now The Parole Board has some work to do in order to present our thoughts to him on what it will take to get LBB to the next level, but we very well might have met the person that can make it happen. 

I would definitely say the LBB stock is on the rise.  With the ideas and dedication of The Parole Board plus the support of the INMATES...well, be ready for some great things to happen in 2012.  So INMATES, here's to all of us, as Life Behind Bars is just as much yours as it is ours.  Toast!   

LBB Beta Site

The Parole Board is kicking it into high gear when it comes to the LBB website.  As many of you already know, the site is currently in Beta Mode (testing).  We spend countless hours tinkering with the site in an attempt to try to think of what it needs.  But, instead of us trying to determining everything it needs, we would rather get feedback from some INMATES. 

After all, it's the INMATES that will be using the site, so why shouldn't we get some input on various things you would like?  Also, if there are things that aren't working right, are hard to figure out, etc - well, we want to know about that.  The plan is to migrate the INMATES off FaceBook and onto our site, for LBB purposes only of course.  Obviously, we aren't trying to tell people to stop using FaceBook altogether.  Rather, we just want the INMATES to use our website when dealing with LBB stuff.  Having our own site is absolutely essential.  By doing so, we will have complete control over how things work and look (FYI - we will also have a smartphone app that you can download for free in order to conveniently access the site).

Currently, there are four INMATES that have asked me to update the Job Release list with their information.  But, FaceBook is not cooperating and will not allow us to update the list.  In fact, I can't even create a new job posting/job search list.  And these are the little things that drive me crazy.  Don't get me wrong, FaceBook has been pivotal to the growth of LBB.  However, I won't be happy until we are not longer operating under the parameters of another forum.

Anyway, the point is, we are working nonstop on the website and would like to hear what you have to say/think.  If you are interested in obtaining access to the Beta Site in order to let us know your thoughts and recommendations, just let me know and I'll get you access. 

One disclaimer though, we are currently only working on the way the site works.  Functionality is our main task at the moment.  After the site runs the way we want it to, then we will make it ascetically pleasing.  So, just note that the site looks nothing like it will once we launch it.  The colors, fonts, everything will change.  We know how it will look but aren't worried about that right now because it doesn't matter how nice it looks if it doesn't work. 

Countdown To Sunday

We are only 4 days away from the New Year's Casino Riot.  The Parole Board is beyond excited about this event.  The next 96 hours are going to be a stressful, whirlwind marathon of final preparations.  We have been on the phone constantly collecting donations for the raffle and getting all the last minute details ready for the party.  

I spoke with INMATE Patrick Zimmerman who is working furiously to complete the BATTLESHOTS drinking game for the event.  In case you don't know, the plan is to have a silent auction for the game with all the proceeds going to Autism Speaks.  Big shout-out to Patrick for this donation!  Be sure to bring extra cash for the auction as this item is going to be quite popular.

I hope all the INMATES are as excited as The Parole Board is about this Sunday.  To our knowledge, this is the first time the service industry will get their own NYE party, which is long overdue.  So, bring your lucky rabbit's foot and get ready to have a blast gambling, drinking, celebrating and welcoming in 2012.  Toast!

Perks of the Job

One of the best perks of running Life Behind Bars is meeting so many great people.  The INMATES are awesome.  And when it comes to drinking, they throw down.  On Wednesday night, The Warden and I planned to visit a few INMATES at their bars. 

We started at Whiskey Cake in Plano around 8:00 p.m.  Joanna Howard was bartending and The Warden and I began drinking face eraser shots (mind eraser - sub rumple for vodka).  After a couple of those, we proceeded into Addison.  The first stop once we were there was The Muckey Duck (formerly Zen).  Justin Foster was behind the bar, which always makes for an amusing bar experience.  For those of you that aren't in the know, Justin is a comedian.  Naturally, we had several laughs.  And, another face eraser. 

After that, we headed over to Champps to see Alexis Rolon.  She proceeded to buy us another face eraser.  She's cool like that.  Another INMATE, Skylar Rain, who is new to LBB, met us at Champps.  Unfortunately, I cannot recall whether or not he had a face eraser.  I know that he had a shot, but my memory fails me as to what kind of shot it was.  Or, perhaps it's not so much the memory failing as the alcohol working.

The next stop was Dukes Original Roadhouse, where the Mendoza sisters were working.  A large group of INMATES were rioting (partying) there, so we wanted to join in the festivities.  By the time we arrived, the party had already departed.  We spoke with Melissa Mendoza and she said the group relocated to The Back 9.  Shockingly, we didn't have a shot Dukes. 

The Back 9 was the last stop of the evening, where INMATE Michael "Lucky" Peters was tending bar.  When The Warden and I strolled through the door, there were approximately 20 INMATES boozing it up.  It's hard to describe the atmosphere, but picture some kind of reunion party, where people haven't seen each other in a long time.  That's a perfect excuse to drink excessively and act a fool.  The only thing is, the INMATES see each other all the time!  The INMATES just know how to have a great time..night after night.  And they wasted no time buying us shots so that we could partake in those reindeer games. 

Before I knew it, everyone was feeling toasty and crazy shit was happening.  The Warden was absolutely smashed and walking around with a scarf covering his face, thus giving a new meaning to face eraser; Danille Pirtle was asked to leave because she couldn't keep her head up, so we had to carry her to a car so she could sleep; Alexis and I were judging a bikini contest; and AJ Hammel passed out, pissed himself and was surrounded by people in panda bear costumes.  All in all, it was a great night.  I love the INMATES!